Procrastination? What’s That About?
Procrastination is a very familiar companion – or at least for the last few weeks anyway. I’ve been putting off doing my newsletter. And what is this about?
I did a bit of tapping on this about this, and first the thought was that I don’t have anything interesting to say, and I was a bit sad about that. Tap, tap, tap. And then I moved on to being angry with myself. Tap, tap, tap… then after a few minutes I said to myself ‘JUST DO IT’.
So here I am doing it! (Try this for yourself when you are putting off doing something – just say whatever comes into your head and tap away).
I think we all get caught up in things having to be perfect but as Tony Robbins said ‘Perfection is a ridiculously low standard because you can never achieve it.’
And how true is that?
Because perfectionism keeps us from doing ANYTHING. It can keep us paralysed, stuck and when you think about it, who wants to be perfect anyway? (I don’t know about you but perfect people can be really boring. The ones with all their quirks, funny mannerisms and actually people just being their authentic selves are the ones that I want to hang out with!).
And you have no idea, how many times I have written things, given talks, run workshops, and at some level, yep, it could have been better, but that’s not the point. The point is getting out there and doing your best at the time. And if it isn’t perfect, maybe there is something you can learn for next time.
But on a more serious note, where does this desire for perfectionism come from? Usually, as with most of these things, it comes from our childhood.
In my own case, that was how I got attention – never rocking the boat, things always doing things well, you could always rely on me to get things done. No one ever told me to behave like this. At some level, I made a decision to do this for a whole host of reasons, so I accept full responsibility for myself.
And that’s fine to be perfect, but it can be at the expense of yourself, and affect your self-esteem and self-worth. (Who I am is not good enough, other people are more important than me, if I don’t do things perfectly then people won’t like me etc etc.) Sound familiar?
It even affected my ‘coolness’ rating as a teen. I remember this guy who lived near and who I quite fancied, but he was a bit wild, a bit dangerous (making him even more attractive!). We used to have these long chats (and all we did was chat!), and one day he said to me ‘Grainne, the thing about you is that you are so dependable’. Talk about KISS OF DEATH! PASSION KILLER! I mean I knew then that nothing was ever going to happen with him.
I related this to a group of friends and to honour the person that I wanted to be, my lovely husband bought me this mug (see photo above) saying ‘Little Miss Trouble’. On the back it says:
‘Here comes trouble’ people used to say. And who would come walking along. Oh, the trouble she caused.
A great reminder of who I am to be.
This desire for perfectionism is something that I have worked on with tapping, looking at who I was as a child, why did I need behave like this to get attention, and releasing the emotion, beliefs and behaviours around that. So, I have definitely made huge strides in that department.
And the thing is, the people who you will remember and possibly the ones who change the world, are the ones who rock the boat, who have the courage not to be perfect and to step outside the box. So, I urge you to embrace your inner ‘Little Miss/Mr trouble’. And if you want some help with this, give me a call.
It’s not about causing trouble for the sake of it, but more about voicing your dissatisfaction when things aren’t right or you don’t agree with it.
And we all know that being Miss Trouble is definitely more fun!