Overcoming FearsDon't let your fears keep you from experiencing all of life
Fear can be a useful emotion. It stops us getting falling off the side of the cliff, putting our hands in the fire and generally keeps us safe.
However, when we are under a lot of stress and pressure, the natural fear instinct can go into overdrive and stop us from doing everyday tasks. This fear can lead us to feeling symptoms of anxiety, and prevent us from doing the things that we want to do in the way that we would like to do them.
Susan Jeffers has a very good book called ‘Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway’. In her book, Jeffers talks about just going for it or repeatedly exposing yourself to the situation that you have a fear of. By doing this, you can overcome your fear.
But not everyone is able to do this and if this is you, you may need to get some help with this. The key to unlocking and releasing fear is to see where the root of the problem has come from. We are not trying to get rid of fear altogether (as fear does have a useful function) but to make sure that the fear is more balanced and is helping rather than hindering us.
Public Speaking Or Speaking Up In A Group Of People
Apparently, people fear speaking in public more than they fear death! I’m always surprised by that.
This is a very common fear, and it’s not just about getting up in front of a room full of 100 or more people, it can be as simple as speaking or expressing your opinion in a group, talking at a meeting or giving a presentation to a small or large group.
Sarah worked in quite a high powered job. She was very good at her work and had been praised by her bosses on many occasions. However, any time that she had to give a presentation or was present at a meeting, she felt this huge anxiety.
She would stumble over her words, get confused and sometimes not even talk at a meeting, even though she knew she had useful things to say.
In most areas of her life, she was very confident, so she couldn’t understand what was going on and why she acted this way.
With tapping EFT, found the source of where her anxiety came from.
There were a couple of incidents going back to her school days.
In one incident, she had been asked to read in front of the class, and she couldn’t get the words out, and made a mess of it.
To an adult, this seems like quite a small incident and not that important, but to a 7 or 8 year old, it is a HUGE DEAL.
Feeling embarrassed in front of all of her friends, the teacher not being especially kind about it and making her feel stupid, some of her classmates being mean to her…. this had a much bigger effect on her than she realised.
With tapping EFT, we worked on releasing the emotions that she felt around this, until she got to the stage where it was just something that happened, and she felt no emotion around it.
At the next session, she reported feeling calmer at the meeting, and was better able to express herself.
We did a couple of sessions, and at each one we uncovered other incidents that had contributed to her anxiety at meetings. By the end of our work together, she felt calm, confident and was able to get her point across, and didn’t think twice about speaking at meetings.
‘You truly are gifted Grainne and I feel so grateful to have met you and worked with you!’
Phobias –Driving on Motorways/Flying
Another common problem that people have is with flying and driving on motorways etc.
In most cases, they previously had no problem getting on a plane or driving on a motorway and then they developed this fear.
Jackie came to me as she had this fear of flying. For years she had no problem at all getting on a plane and for the last number of years, every time she wanted to fly somewhere, she had to dose herself up with pills, alcohol – whatever would numb her from the experience, she took it!
Through tapping EFT, we worked back to where the problem initiated, and it turned out to go back to a very traumatic birth of one of her children.
Jackie had a birth plan worked out, and through various circumstances this went completely out the window. None of what she wanted happened, and she felt railroaded into taking all of these drugs, no one listened to her and what should have been a very happy experience, turned into a major trauma.
This is not unusual and I have worked with a number of people who have experienced traumatic births.
In terms of Jackie’s symptoms, possibly it was to do with the loss of control (and when you think about it, when you get on a plane, you have to hand complete control over to the pilot!).
Once we released the trauma of what happened during the birth, Jackie’s fear of flying was gone.
She reported back that when she was in the airport and she kept thinking, ‘I should be scared now’ at various stages of the journey (check-in, departure lounge, on the plane etc), and she wasn’t at all.
‘I enjoyed working with Grainne, even when tough stuff has come up, she has helped me be brave enough to face it head on. Not only that, but she has helped me relax and take things a little less seriously, see the humour in the thread of life. She makes what could be a trying and painful process full of ease and even pleasant’
Similarly, I have worked with people with vertigo, fear of travelling on motorways/busy roads. Clients are always surprised at what has triggered the fear in the first place and are delighted with the results.
Can EFT help you cope with anxiety? Book Your Free 15 Minute Clarity Call.
If you are struggling with anxiety and would like to see if the Emotional Freedom Technique can help – book your free 15 minute clarity call with Grainne to see what EFT can do for you.
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