It’s been a while since I’ve written a post.
With family illness and bereavements, I’ve had to step back a bit.
In times like these, you just have to recognise that you may not be able to do as much as you would normally do, plus everything takes a little bit longer.
Once you give in to that, it takes some of the pressure off.
I was recently speaking with someone about grief and they felt that they were not grieving because they hadn’t cried very much.
My own experience with grief over the years is that it comes out differently for everyone, and with each loss, you may express it in a different way.
When my dad died many years ago, I was working for a large corporation. Something had gone wrong with a particular client and I was bawling my eyes out.
My boss at the time was very supportive and sympathetic and she said to me ‘Grainne, it’s not a big deal’.
What I now understand is that it was the grief coming out; just not in the way I expected it.
And grief isn’t just about death. It could be mourning a relationship that you wish you had had, or life not turning out the way you had hoped and expected.
All of these losses can trigger a grief and sadness.
When you have a physical injury, it is tiring as the body is working to repair itself 24/7. And it is the same with grief.
It’s not just during waking hours that you are working your way through it. You are processing and repairing all the time, and it can be exhausting.
So, be kind to yourself if you are dealing with a lot. Give yourself some space to feel the emotions and do what you need to do to help yourself to feel better.
Btw, I do understand that in the midst of everything, you may not always know what makes you feel better.
What you can ask yourself is with each activity, is this making me feel better or worse? Try to choose more of the ones that are making you feel better.
And remember, most things don’t have to be done TODAY!!
So, take the pressure off; be kind to yourself and go gently.