Well, it does feel like things are really being shaken up at the moment.
When Donald Trump was inaugurated, one of the first things that I heard about was the reinstatement of the work on the Dakota Pipeline.
My first reaction was fear – it just bubbled up. I was surprised by this and just took a step back and observed it.
And then I realised, we still have a long way to go! How will I cope with the emotions that are coming up?
Feeling an emotion is normal, but it is when we start to react from a place of fear that the problem arises.
Isn’t it better to be calm and relaxed when you are reacting or making any decision?
There is no doubt about it. Donald Trump will definitely continue to ruffle a lot of people’s feathers.
You can see the headlines: Donald Trump On Immigration, Donald Trump Twitter Account – what he’s saying now, Donald Trump Daughter stealing the show etc etc etc.
I do believe that Trump is a big mirror to us all, and may be reflecting the worst part of ourselves.
When have we been prejudiced (moi? Surely not???)? When have we made assumptions about people? When have we acted out of fear?
It brings to mind for me, the story of ho’oponopono.
I’ll tell you the story as I heard it originally.
There was a psychiatric institution for those who had been classified as ‘criminally insane’ in Hawaii.
The patients were so troubled that the staff were constantly being physically attacked, and it really was not a safe place to be.
Various patients were classified as violent, and were kept sedated or shackled. Because of this, there was a very high staff turnover. No one wanted to work there.
They then hired Dr Hew Len to work with these patients.
When Dr Len took on the role he said that he would not be doing traditional therapy (this clearly hadn’t worked anyway).
In fact, he did not even see or visit any of the patients.
Within a couple of months, things had improved.
There weren’t as many patients who were sedated and shackled, and over the next few years, things got better and better. Patients were being released, and were deemed to be cured.
Dr Len was asked, what he had done? How had he cured these people without even seeing them?
And his answer was ‘I healed the madness in me?’
What he had done was that he would spend time looking at each file.
When he looked at a file, he observed the feeling that it brought up in him – fear, shame, anger, sadness, repulsion etc.
Then as he thought about each feeling, he would say the Hawaiin ho’oponopono mantra:
‘I’m sorry, I love you, please forgive me thank you’ over and over again.
And he kept on doing this, until he felt he had cleared the feelings in himself.
Remarkably, this had an effect on the inmates.
The thinking behind it is that you have 100% responsibility for everything (yes, everything!) that shows up in your life, and it reflects something that needs to be healed in you.
So, if you are feeling triggered by something that is happening outside of you, there is something within that you need to heal.
Interesting isn’t it? Makes you think.
So, for those of you who are feeling powerless by what is going on at a political/geographic level, reacting to what Donald Trump is doing, why not take a different approach and see what needs to be cleared in you.
Here are a couple of suggestions:
1. Practice Ho’oponopono
Of course it has to be this.
When you next hear or see something that Trump has done (or with any other situation in your life), and you are feeling some emotion, try practicing ho’oponopono.
Spend a few minutes, each day focusing on the issue and saying the mantra
‘I’m sorry, I love you, please forgive me, thank you’.
Let me know how you get on.
2. Go Within And See What Is Really Going on:
Some people will find this easier than others.
Take some time out and go within and see what it is you might need to learn or heal in your life.
Allow yourself to feel whatever emotions these outside circumstances are bringing up in you.
Ask yourself, what does this feeling remind you of (or who)? Is there some unresolved emotion about something/someone that happened in the past that you could heal?
The next step is to take some action on this, and to do the work needed to heal you.
Tapping EFT* can help you with this. Call me!
*EFT Emotional Freedom Technique is a system where you tap on acupuncture points as a way of releasing stress, anxiety and negative beliefs.
I offer a free 15 minute Discovery call to just have a chat to see how you can work on whatever it is that is coming up for you.
3. What are you saying to yourself? Could you be a bit nicer?
With all the rhetoric that Trump is spouting out at the moment, you have to ask, where is all of this emotion, vitriol and hatred coming from?
Not that I expect many people to have sympathy, but if that is what Donald Trump is saying about all of these other races, nationalities etc, the chances are that what he is saying to himself is probably a lot worse. (Boo hoo, I hear you say!).
So what are you saying to yourself (c’mon, be honest, bet you’re not saying nice things to yourself).
Very often I say to clients, if anyone else said to you the things that you say to yourself, you would tell them where to get off.
You just wouldn’t stand for it.
Why not start to have a nicer dialogue with yourself? Contact me and let’s have a chat about how you can heal your critical voice.
4. Are you going towards fear or towards happiness?
Well, I think that fear is a big factor in a lot of what is going on in the world.
Fear of unknown cultures, fear of being attacked, fear of what happens if you don’t do something etc.
Marianne Williamson says that with every action we take, we are either going towards fear or towards happiness.
So, for example, you are completely exhausted, all you really want to do is to take a break, have some down time… and maybe you go ahead and do that difficult task, and then end up being doubly exhausted.
In that situation, maybe you felt fear that if you hadn’t done that everything will fall apart, you will lose your job – blah, blah – whatever you tell yourself.
Of course there are situations where you will have to push yourself beyond what you feel able for, but so much of the time, we just put this pressure on ourselves.
Take some time to ask yourself, am I going towards happiness, or am I going towards fear.
Do I really need to do all of this right now? What is motivating me to do this: is it happiness or fear?
You may come up with some interesting answers.
5. Start being kind to yourself – what brings you joy?
Life is hard enough, and we sometimes have very harsh demands of ourselves – and wouldn’t dream of expecting the same from others.
Maybe it is time to start being nice to yourself.
Take some time out to do whatever it is that brings you joy.
Now, beware of those ‘worthy’ things.
What we want is something that will make you laugh out loud, bring a huge smile to your face, have you giggling… you know the type of thing.
Doing this will leave you more able for whatever life has to throw at you.
So, next time you hear or see something related to Donald Trump, instead of rising up in anger or fear, why not take a step back and see what you could learn from this.
To learn more about Grainne O’Neill and the work that she does, please click on the following link: www.grainnemoneill.com